Letters.

From Kelso:
You are great.
i love you. please just read this. i need you to know that if i could take back everything i did, i would.
only to make things right.(between us)
i regret it and i only lied about it because i was afraid.
i never meant to hurt you, and i know it did, and i knew it would. it screwed up my life bad enough, i didn't mean for it to effect yours too. that's the only thing i ever lied to you about,and i'm not lying about that either.
just tell me what to do and i'll do it. i'll do anything.
again, i love you.

-kelsey 

From Me:
I have let it go. and after the events of this weekend i have DEFINITELY let it go,
I think to a degree, I held you to a sort of perfection you couldn't achieve. I apologize, I recently realized how hard it is for someone to juggle two relationships without hurting one friend or potentially losing the other. I did something awful that wasn't entirely my fault, but if I could have stood my ground it might not of happened. I hurt someone I wanted to be friends with. They won't forgive me because, why should they? I also realized how you can unintentionally put yourself in bad positions so in the end wether its not totally your fault, I guess in a way it still is. The sad part is, when your in the middle it feels like there is no way out, and then when it's all said and done, you see all the things you could have done so much better.

I won't lie to you, I have been keeping my distance from you. I was afraid to let you back into my life again. Making myself vulnerable to you seemed like a bad idea. I let what you did to me, make me forget why I loved you in the first place. I am so sorry that I let your low moments outweigh the beauty i see in you everyday. I'm sorry I forgot that when I said that we were friends and that I loved you, that meant it was unconditional. I should have never expected you to not fail me. I really think that people really become friends when something happens that could destroy their relationship and they make it. What you did only effected my life because I let it bother me more then I should of.
I know that hurting me wasn't your intention. It's okay though, we all fall short. I'll have to learn to trust you again. But that's okay too.

So Kelso, I'm letting it go because I think you deserve it. I see so much in you, I think you are worth a second, third, fourth, fifth chance. I'm also forgiving you because I would want someone to forgive me. I would want someone to see that I had more to offer 

I love you Kelsssss. I never stopped.

I do not miss 5th grade.

*names have been changed.

Dear Miss Timmerwoman,
I despise you. You are a fat, ugly, useless excuse for a teacher. You should retire. Youmade my 5th grade year awful and meaningless. I missed countless recesses because you did not like me. I would like to poke you in the eye with an inanimate object. You were a stupid teacher and I didn't learn anything in your class. and AND,,,I WAS THE one who kept stealing your pens :D.


Love,
Monica.

PS: And I NEVER had to write with pens in middle school. God you suck.

M.(Josiah<3)E.J.

I walk through the door. My eyes adjust to the dim room. Inside I see the two of them. The smallest one raises his hand out of the bundle of blankets. I run to the cooing little bundle. I hold him and stare into is big gray-green eyes. Tiny tears for the tiny one. I missed the beginning of his story, I hope I never see the end. He puts his small hand to my nose and smiles his toothless smile. My nephew. Josiah. Joy.

Well okay...

So, Sam told me to blog about what makes me angry. That presents a problem because I'm not angry about anything. Maybe that is what's wrong with me. Maybe I lack passion. I should work on that.
Being original is important to me.
:/

i have no clue what to talk about. thats so sad.